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Crushed Cigarettes (a Herculean Effort for Naught)

from Every Moment of Every Day by Short Fictions

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lyrics

it hurts
to know
how hard
we tried before we failed
I won’t forget
the work
and experiences that got us here

yes I may have gained your father’s trust
and your sister and you brother never spoke too much
your mother’s someone I would have loved to have met
in your room I just sat on the floor
counting crushed cigarettes and staring at your door
a feeling I know I will never forget

but now my dream girl just doesn’t exist,
things are still the same but they’ve never been like this
I’ll just think it over, and over in my head until it spins
and it hurts

I’d be amiss to say I’m not proud
oh but everything’s changing and it’s freaking me out,
and I don’t think that I can do it again
no matter how the changes play out
you’ll always be the one I’m thinking about
I promise I will always be your friend

But now my dreams are just all that exist
things are still the same but they’ve never been like this
but I am so proud oh I am glad that you exist
so please don’t remind me of any of this
I never want time to move forward just stay still, I hate this I’m shaking, I’m sick of it and it hurts

credits

from Every Moment of Every Day, released June 24, 2022

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Short Fictions Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

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